Moving on.
This is an intimate excerpt from the ‘Moving On-Stories of DAWN Women Survivors’, a publication produced by the Development Action for Women Network to advocate ‘protection and promotion’ of migrant women’s rights. In her own words this is the life story of Rose, a member of the Sikhay project and one of the three women working along side us here. With Roses permission we are sharing this story to illustrate the realities of ‘third world’ poverty, human rights abuse and those marginalised by ineffective policy.
Rose.
Failure and Distress.
I am the youngest of a brood of ten. We grew up and lived in Masbate. Our father died of a heart attack when we were still young. Because of poverty and a big family my mother could not single-handedly support my studies, so I only finished elementary.
The poor life we had forced me to go to Manila to find a living. I wanted to give my family a better life and treat my mother’s sickness. I tried many jobs just to earn. I went to different houses to sell shampoo. I would earn P50 a day. I also experienced selling ‘balut’ (native egg) and other such items just to earn to help my family and especially my mother.
At the age of 21 I went to Japan without hesitation. My elder sister whom I was staying with in Manila, signed for the parental consent which I needed before leaving. She just copied my mother’s signature. Months passed and then I finally went to Japan.
The ‘answer’ to poverty.
At the age of 21 I went to Japan without hesitation. I signed a six-month contract as a dancer. I first left in January 1990 and went to Fukuoka, Japan. During my first contract, I was paid $350 a month. I got an increase of $50 during my second contract until I got $400 for my last.
I sent my monthly salary to my mother. During my first contract, my mother didn’t even know that I was already working in Japan. But she was wondering why I was earning and sending her a big amount of money.
Being an entertainer was not an easy job but I endured everything for my family. I had to be careful not to be harassed by my customers especially if they liked me. I even had to have many dohan in a month. If my number of dohan in a month exceeded my $350 monthly salary, I would surely get 3,000 yen as commission in a month. One dohan was equivalent to ten points while I got eight points for each food and drink.
They said I was a good dancer so I was given solo numbers. But aside from dancing and sitting down with customers, we were also tasked to wash dishes and what they called shobori, the small towel the customers used. I almost didn’t have any time to rest and later suffered from over fatigue. I spent for my medical consultation and medicines. I was not able to use my health insurance. When I got well, I immediately went back to work. I was thinking of the money.
Meeting and parting ways.
I met the father of my child in the club where I was working. He was a regular customer there. He courted me and I didn’t have any second thought of accepting him because of the kindness he showed me.
Before I was able to finish my contract, I got pregnant after going out on dohan with him for several times. Nevertheless, I still managed to work. I was still dancing though I was already six months pregnant. If I didn’t fulfil my obligation in the club, I would get a salary deduction of $50. For someone like me who wanted to earn for the family, I didn’t bother to object. I just followed the system without my boyfriend’s knowledge. My papa-san would ask me to dance if he knew that my boyfriend was not around.
Life seemed to be like that when you are in a foreign land and are in dire need. You will do everything. You just can’t refuse.
My angel.
Though I went home pregnant, I was whole-heartedly welcomed and accepted by my family. I gave birth to Angel in the Philippines on July 16, 1993. I was so happy because she looked like her father.
Her father came to the Philippines in May 1994. Angel was about to turn one then. Like me, he was so happy when he first saw Angel. He even noticed their similarities. We would call her ‘Angel’ because she was truly a heaven sent to us.
After two years, May 1996, he came back again to the Philippines to visit us. That was the last time we saw each other. In spite of that, he still managed to call us every Saturday. Angel and I would go to my manager’s house and wait for his call. Until a friend offered to accept my boyfriend’s calls so we didn’t have to travel and so we didn’t have to spend money on transport.
I was not aware that my friend accepted my boyfriend’s calls without my knowledge. She would talk to him and would not bother to call me. Only her daughter told me about it. It was not clear to me yet what they were talking about until he stopped calling us. He also stopped sending money. He was not always around every time I would call his office. When I chanced upon him, I learned that my friend told him untrue rumours. My boyfriend believed her though it was not true.
Getting up after a failure.
We completely lost communication and problems came one after the other. Aside from being abandoned by Angel’s father, we were also asked to leave the house we were renting. Even Angel’s studies was affected, she twice failed to finish her schooling at the day care center.
I was also slowly losing all what I worked for and bought from my earnings in Japan. My appliances were among those destroyed in a fire which broke off in our place. I went back to selling items on the street to provide for Angel’s needs. She became my source of strength everyday.
I learned about DAWN through Angel’s teacher. In May 2000, we began joining the activities of DAWN together with the other women and children.
In DAWN’s search for Angel’s father, we also learned the truth about his family. He is not living alone contrary to what he told me. He has a Japanese wife and two children. They didn’t know about me and Angel.
Nevetheless, he started sending some support again for us after he met Angel. That was a big help to us especially when we had to transfer to another house after temporarily staying at the DAWN Center. We used the money he sent us for paying the monthly rental and for Angel’s needs in school.
Like Angel, I am also an active member of Teatro Akebono. I was one of those chosen to play the role of Misty in the musical play, ‘Ibat-Ibang Mukha ni Misty’ (The Different Faces of Misty). Because of that, I was able to go to different schools and communities in and out of Manila to perform. Through that I am able to share my experiences and sacrifices as a former entertainer and now a single parent and member of Sikhay.
Though there are challenges and times may be hard, I have my child Angel who’s been my source of strength. Above all else, she is the most important reason why I am striving and continuing my battle against all odds.
